Reading

The Kid is sitting at the kitchen table working on his homework and I look over and see him tracing a picture from the computer screen. I have never seen anyone trace from a computer screen, nor have I even thought of the idea.* Homework sure has changed over the years! When I was a kid, we would have to prepare in advance by making sure we looked up things in the library during the week and to bring home the necessary resources for the weekend project. If you forgot to do so, you'd have to cobble together something from the set of encyclopedias that you might be lucky enough to have in your house. 

It appears that today, homework is done by gathering data from the internet;  and I assume that now teachers grade the work based on how well the kids  cut and paste it all together - basically they are junior editors -  not by how succinctly they can put together sentences. And this may also be the reason why at work I see so many poorly constructed emails and poor spelling (which shouldn't occur at all since just about every computer and phone with text messaging has a spell checker). In many cases, I find that emails from people that have university degrees are often the worst for spelling errors and poor diction. And it seems to me formal education has less to do with good writing and grammar, but usually the people who write and compose the best are those that read a lot  - thank goodness for books! If you don't mind getting a soft cover, books are often not that expensive - often around $10 - $15, or less if you buy an electronic version. I am not a big reader like some people I know who read fast and can devour books in mere days, but I read a fair amount - I often have a magazine tucked in my purse, a book on my night-table and several books on my computer or iPod. There was a time when I would proudly show off my two little bookcases to people in my early apartment and tell them that I had read every book on the shelves. I can't say that today - today I am one of these people who owns more books than I have read, but I'm okay with that. They all get looked at from time to time. 

It also seems to run in the family -not just me but  my mom has a large collection of books and so does my brother - who has a couple bookcases of just cookbooks alone! About a decade ago it looked like the book world was doomed, but along came Amazon and Chapters and then e-readers and the industry seemed to be looking up. Every time I have stepped into a Chapters store there have always been lots of people in the store, and they are not just there because of the Starbucks either. 

So perhaps there is stil hope for reading and writing after all. What do you think? Are you a reader? And tell me how your kids do their homework, I am really curious about that as well. 

*Not to mention that I was taught to avoid touching your computer screen so that it wouldn't be damaged! 

A Question for Un-mums

So as most of us in North America know, yesterday was Mother's Day and I have a question for all the 'non-mothers' :

Have you ever been somewhere like in a restaurant and a staff member passes you a flower for Mother's Day? Do you take it, or decline it? That happened to me once, and I tried to be nice and save that flower for a real mother, by saying 'I'm not a mother' but was then chastised by several people at the table who told me I should have just taken it. I thought I was being nice to the 'real moms'.

So on Mother's Day, if you don't have any children, and people want to give you things for being a mom, or wish you a "Happy Mother's Day", do you say nothing and take the gift or the well wishes or try to correct them? Does it bother you? And what about 'step mothers' or 'other mothers'? Are they honoured? What do you do for them? Feel free to tell me what you think, I'm very curious you know. 

Noticing

Sometimes I think that humans are losing the ability to notice things around them. Why with all the things coming at us, surely the vast majority is suffering from information overload. As well, I wonder if perhaps since so many resources are telling us things, we're just so busy processing all the inputs that we can't see things ourselves.

When I was a kid, my brothers and I liked car rides and liked to look out the windows and see what was going on (makes it sound like we were a bunch of dogs doesn't it?) Of course even though it's not that long ago, it was a different time. Today, all three of us have excellent skills for getting around our city, and even new cities we just land in. I don't know how many times I'd get off a plane, pick up a rental car, hop on the freeway and just start driving and make it just fine to my destination - and that's in the days without TomToms and GPS. You know, sometimes I wonder if the navigation systems are making it harder for people. Why just the other day someone was coming to visit us and asked us for our address so she could input it in her GPS. We've lived here over 11 years and she's been here multiple times! Goodness! As I am driving I am constantly assessing the road and the route and often change the streets I'm going to take - and I can do it because I know our city so very well. And if I've been somewhere once, I don't need directions again - unless it's been years and years and years but even then that's pretty rare.

Which brings me back to my initial thought - on January 19th, 2010 I had my hair cut short. Almost all my hair was about 1cm long  - that was the last haircut I had (except my bangs which I cut myself) - one full year ago. My hair is now down to my shoulders and can be put in a ponytail holder if I want. But you you know what? Not one single person has noticed or commented. And some people only see me every couple of months. So either they haven't noticed that it's slowly been getting longer or they just don't see the need to comment, or maybe it looks bad.... (maybe they practice  "if you can't say anything nice" ). I have no idea.

Now friends, please don't feel bad, no hard feelings, I'm sure I've missed things in your lives too. I'm not trying to be superior or 'call anyone out'. I'm just asking a question. Maybe humans just aren't as good at observing as they think they are - multiple times I've heard police agencies comment that eye witness aren't as accurate as they once thought. Have you walked down a street and found a sign that has been there for years that you haven't noticed? Or seen something, shook your head and realized you though it looked different or was a different colour? I guess the old adage to 'stop and smell the roses' is more important than ever before. Please, tell me what you think.

The Great Horoscope Debate

Recently in the news there has been talk that we are not actually the sign that we think we are because the planetary alignment has changed over the years.

And also in the new is this, please read and watch all of it.

Now, I'm curious, will you still read your horoscope daily in the paper and will you throw out the New Year 2011 predictions you cut out and save every January? What do you think of all this?

Time is Relative

Isn't it interesting how our feelings about time change with the event? For example:

• It's been almost 10 years since my younger older brother, his family and I drove to Alberta in a weekend to celebrate my older brother's 40th birthday - it feels like a long time
• I've been employed at the same company for 11 years -sometimes it feels like a long time, sometimes it feels like it went fast
• My dad passed away 13 years ago - it feels like a life time, way too long
• My step son just turned twelve - time flies, seems like he was just a little kid yesterday
• Jp and I have been together for 10 years - it feels just right (really!)
• We've lived in this house for 12 years - time flies, I never expected to stay here that long

Kids definitely grow up too fast, dogs are only puppies for a few short months, the passing of a loved one can feel like a long time even if it's only been a short time.

What events do you feel happened 'only yesterday' or 'seem like it was forever ago'? 

Is this a mid-life crisis?

Man, more and more these days I don't seem to fit anywhere. I don't seem to understand why people do the things they do - am I alone in this?

My job frustrates me- but I can't talk about that here because people get fired because of stuff posted on the internet. Let's just say that things don't make sense, but no one seems to care - and I have to keep reminding myself 'who the hell am I? who's going to listen to me? why would my opinion matter?' I just need to do my job and keep my mouth shut. That's how to survive.

Now I know you're thinking, gee lady why don't you just quit and go elsewhere, but the thing is I work from home. Yes, I am a paid salaried employee who gets to work from home. That may sound all great, but it means that finding a new job can be difficult - I won't get into it here though.

I need a change, but  I don't know what to do. Oh sure you say, go on a vacation   - but I can't afford to do that, so my life stays the same.... whine whine whine, I know.

If you feel the same and have any comments for me, please let me know. I can't believe I'm this old and still trying to find my place in the world.

Is something happening?

Normally in my belly dance classes we have between 8-10 people who sign up, a couple drop off and some drop in from time to time. Imagine the surprise last night to see 24 people! That's almost three times the usual attendance!

Chatting with the instructor she had no idea why, and says she doesn't take it personally which I suppose is good  thinking, especially for the times when no one shows up; and chatting with some of the other 'regulars' they had no idea why either - no articles in the local paper that they knew of. Is it a Halloween thing? Did something happen on "So You Think You Can Dance?" I may never know the reason unless I go up to each of the women and ask.

What's your theory for the sudden interest?

Canine Profiling

Tonight's news told a story of a 6 month old puppy that had to be put down after a pit bull attack in a park. The puppy was on a leash and being trained by his owner. He asked the pit bull owner if the dog was safe to play with and that owner said it was. Sadly it wasn't and it critically mauled the puppy. "Men couldn't pry the pit bull's mouth open after it locked onto the puppy."

A blue tick coonhound puppy was so badly injured in a prolonged attack by a pit bull terrier that it had to be put down.

Three men used a baseball bat in an attempt to pry six-month-old Jet from the jaws of his attacker, but the pit bull only gave up when bear spray was blasted in its face.

By then, Jet was bleeding from the mouth, "had a tear in its back leg, a bad gash down the front and its left shoulder broken in two places and torn open," said Jim Scott, father of Jamie, the puppy's owner.

Police are investigating Thursday evening's attack, which happened after Jamie took Jet, his first dog, to Rudd Park in Saanich. He was holding the puppy on a 10-metre rope to practise basic commands.

Jamie noticed another man throwing a ball for a pit bull.

"I asked him is yours safe to play and he said 'yes'," Jamie, 27, said Friday.

The two dogs sniffed. The other man threw the ball and the pit bull retrieved it and brought it back. But when Jet picked up the ball, the pit bull lunged on him.

"He was submissive because he doesn't know how to fight," Jamie said.

"The other dog grabbed onto his chest and was pulling his chest off. There was a five-inch by four-inch gaping wound on his chest."

The owner of the pit bull laid on his dog trying to unlock its jaws but to no avail.

Jamie tried kicking the dog, then a neighbour brought a baseball bat.

Jamie called Jim, who lives close by, while others called police and the pound.

Jamie got Jet away from the other dog, but because the pit bull was not wearing a collar, it slipped out of its owner's grasp and attacked again.

"It grabbed my dog's front leg and broke it, then went for its face and neck," Jamie said.

A motorist stopped to help, taking the baseball bat.

"But the jaw was so shut, there was no way to get the bat inside [to pry it open]," Jamie said.

"There were three grown men trying to get a pit bull to break its grip and it just wouldn't."

Jim arrived with bear spray, which he blasted into the pit bull's mouth and nose.

"It let go of my dog and my dog started walking away on a broken leg but he didn't get far — he collapsed in front of the pit bull owner's van," Jamie said.

The pit bull was muzzled and taken away by staff from Saanich pound.

Jamie took Jet to a veterinarian but the dog's injuries were extensive and he was put down.

"He's really playful and was never away from me," Jamie said. "He was starting getting into his role as a dog, turning into a really loyal, good dog."

The pit bull was put down late Friday afternoon with the owner's permission, Jaimie said after receiving word from pound officers.

The same dog was involved in a previous attack earlier this year in Victoria, said Sgt. Dean Jantzen of Saanich police.

Read more: http://www.timescolonist.com/life/Puppy+euthanized+after+attack+Saanich+park+bull/3678892/story.html#ixzz12V5KmZUT

This story saddens and horrifies me. And I think if something so horrendous happened to me, I'd probably need sedation for a couple of weeks. But let me tell you that I have long been cautious of where I take my dogs and that times that I'm out with them. After 20+ years of dog ownership and daily walks, I have have seen a lot and have plenty of stories about being ambushed by loose dogs during daylight hours and often while the owners are present. As well, many owners feel no need to even apologize for the inconvenience and trauma they have put me or my dogs through. And like Kim Rossmo or Gavin de Becker, who have developed criteria for criminal profiling, I have developed my own rules for canine profiling. For example, the other day as Eco and I we were walking I saw a lady with a husky wearing a halti (or gentle leader). Now in my experience, the huskies I have met have been very nippy dogs and at first I wasn't sure if it was a muzzle or a halti, so Eco and I pulled off to the side of the path, and let them past. The owner assured me her dog was safe, but there were enough little signs to cause me to be cautious. Maybe her dog was safe, but I am going to do everything I can to keep my dog for as long as I can and without unnecessary wounding.

Fellow dog lovers, I hope that a situation like the one above never happens to you, and I hope that it never happens again. I am not going to ban the breed, as it were, but I will continue to maintain that bad people have bad dogs and I hope that one day people can become more responsible pet owners.

And maybe one day things like Stephen Colbert's March to Restore Sanity will really do just that.

My Lesson for the Week

In yoga philosophy we are to practise "ahimsa" which means nonviolence. Not only physically but in regard to the body, speech and mind. Usually I don't have an issue with this, but earlier this week I had an eye exam where my Optometrist put some drops in my eyes. The drops were painful and I was surprised that my first reaction was anger. I wanted to punch him in the head. Really! I even told him that I no longer liked him and he replied that he would not take that personally.

After my exam was over with the Optometrist I was sent to a technician who was to take a photo of my eyes. This was after the pupil enlarging drops which made me very light sensitive. Kaboom!  A large flash of light in my right eye and instantly I wanted to curse and punch her in the head. Kaboom! Flash of light in my left eye and same reaction. I never noticed before, probably because I'm not frequently in these situations, that when someone else hurts me, how I react. I was a bit surprised with how quickly this emotion came up and what I wanted to do to that person. I can understand how a person can be 'driven' to react when they or a loved one is hurt or being hurt.

So not only do I need to practice nonharming in my own mind, but I will also need to practice refraining from harmful thoughts about others. Thankfully, I don't think I'll have to be in too many situations where others inflict pain on me and for that I am grateful.

Have you had a similar situation? What was your first reaction?

Money - a touchy subject

I know that people have very specific feelings about money and varying definitions of rich and poor. But I'm going to write about money anyway.  For example, when I'm broke, I don't spend money on anything other than the necessities, as in food and shelter. But other people have a very different definition of broke.

For example, one friend of mine complained about being short of money and having to drive an old car. It's only 7 years old (mine is 30 years old - not that we're in a competition or anything, but still). Second she still had a bottle of wine every night and a pack of smokes everyday - which must be around a  $20/day habit. And she seemed to always be shopping for new clothes. I guess finding bargains at Cotton Ginny is very different from shopping at Holt Renfrew but when I'm short on cash, the first thing I stop buying is clothes and alcohol.

And then there's a guy I know who's got 5 kids, including a 5-year old they adopted who has some issues they are dealing with - with is very admirable I agree. He was complaining about being short on cash and having to move to a neighbouring community due to their financial situation and I was thinking about 'angeling' his family at Christmas time with an anonymous gift of groceries or something - until I ran into him in STARBUCKS where he told me he his whole family just returned from a vacation in Las Vegas!

Ok! I'm done. Oh I know what you're thinking - who asked me to help in the first place? who asked me to feel sorry about them? Well, actually they did by complaining to me about being so broke. Why did they tell me about their woes unless they wanted me to commiserate, right?

So tell me, am I completely way off base on this one?

No Human Contact

As I was washing my face yesterday before bed, I realized that I didn't see one person yesterday. As I walked my dog in the morning, I did see three people out for their morning walks to which we waved and said "good morning" to each other from across the street but that's the closest I was to them - 25' or so across the road. It's not like I laid all day on the couch watching TV. No, I went to work, I wished my mom a "happy birthday", I  mowed the lawn and played ball with the dog - but all day long not one person looked me in the eye.

Does that seem odd to you? I mean nowadays people are so into their own thing that they often have their own music plugged into their head via headphones or are carrying on a conversation everywhere they go on their phone/bluetooth - so maybe my experience isn't even that odd.

It seems we need people to create the things we need/want/desire such as music or food or art or buildings, but otherwise we don't need people, do we? There's an old saying "no man is an island" but does that still apply today? We seem to becoming more and more isolated from each other as time goes on. My brother commented the other day that as he drove by his local highschool all the kids were walking down the road single file. Yes single file! Why? Because almost everyone had their head down and was either doing something on an iPod type device or texting someone - who knows - they were probably texting someone 10' behind them on the sidewalk! Do you remember when the majority of kids would leave school walking in big clumps? Groups of kids would walk together spilling onto lawns and on the road all so they could keep up with each other. Stragglers could be targets for teasing. But now, we don't have groups anymore.

And do people still go out for after work drinks? I've worked from home for so long I have no idea. I see my co-workers in this province once a year - maybe. Back in the day, a group of us girls would all go take a coffee break toghether and have lunch together and then meet at the trendiest restaurants to have after work drinks. But everyone's so busy now and people don't drink and drive like they used to (thank goodness) and everything's more expensive so maybe that doesn't happen any more either.

So when you go to bed at night, count the number of people you looked in the eye that day - and tell me it's more than 5 at least, okay?

Summer passed..

Have you ever been part of a production like a play, or trade show or perhaps even a wedding where you spend months waiting and planning and working and then suddenly it was all over in 1 day or a couple of days? And you're happy that the event went well, but it was so fast compared to all the preparation? Well that's how I feel about this summer. We had a wet and miserable spring that lasted all the way up until the end of June. Two glorious months that seemed to slip by so fast and then by September it was back to cooler temperatures and rain again. I didn't even get all of my garden ornaments out and some plants didn't even get much of a chance to grow like they normally did. I never even sat outside in the evening with candles glowing, enjoying the cool summer evening after a long hot day. It all went so fast. Do you feel that way too?

Monkeys in commericals

When I was a kid there were commercials for a Western US car dealer "Cal Worthington and his dog Spot" except spot never a dog and was instead a tiger, a seal, an elephant, a bear or a monkey. Ever notice we don't see monkeys or other animals in commercials like we did in the 70's and 80's? Is that because people are bored with animals, or that society doesn't like animals doing tricks for products or because there are less animals around to use on film, or they actually cost less than people actors?

I'm curious, what do you think?

"If people concentrated on the really important things in
life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles." - Doug Larson

I've often said the very same thing about sports fans - and I've been criticized (heavily) over my opinion. But I'm going to stand by it. I really believe that if people spent as much time on self improvement or advancing their lives and/or careers, their health, their relationships etc as they do memorizing sports scores, team trades or other statistics, they and the economy might be in a better position. I have nothing against people participating in sports, but those couch potatoes who waste their whole Sunday on Football  - how is that making their lives, or the lives of others better?

I'm curious, what do you think about this?

How insecure is your load?

I was reading the paper this morning and there was a story about a woman who's car was hit by a runaway Jeep. Apparently it had come loose from a tow truck and freewheeled across the street until it hit something. The paper reported the tow truck driver was charged with an 'insecure load'.

Now to me, the load should be 'unsecure' as I'm sure the load doesn't have low self esteem. However, so far I haven't been able to find out how the actual law is written but it seems both are used.

I'm curious, what do you think it should be?
Do you know the correct wording?

The Evil Shopper

So I'm at Safeway in the express lane around 9pm on Wednesday night. I put my few items from my basket on the belt behind a big buff guy who's next to go through the cashier. As she's processing his stuff a young 20-ish girl swoops in front of me. First I assume she's with the guy - they looked like they belonged together, so I don't think anything of it. Then because she's got her back to me and is leaning towards the cashier, I think she just wants a price check on a pair of glasses which were in her hand. Then she tells the cashier that my goods which are about to be run through aren't hers, so I think she's either wanting a price check or she's a Safeway store employee who quickly needs to run something through the cashier.

Nope.

She was actually purchasing 3 items! I asked the cashier when she had left if the girl worked at the store, and the cashier confirmed she had never seen the girl and an employee should not do that.

So yep, you guessed it.

She just brazenly butted in front of me and bought stuff. My mind went through a gamut of emotions and I tried to be Zen about it. And maybe those who are used to shopping in the big cities are used to this kind of stuff. But this was a new one for me in this little town, on a quiet weekday night at a sleepy little grocery store.

After I finish typing this I will let this story go from my mind, but I just wanted to tell the story and prepare you so you are not surprised by this kind of behaviour as I was.So I'm curious, what would you do? How would you react?

Driving Me Crazy

During my many dog walks, I have the opportunity to pay close attention to how people drive. Did you know that when turning right, even onto a busy street, you don't have to stop? I did not know that. It must be a new rule because I see too many people doing it that they can't all be bad drivers can they?

Also, pedestrians no longer have the right of way. Did you know that? Especially if it is the morning and people are on their way to work, then forget about a pedestrian at a crosswalk. And, if they are also turning right, then well, see the paragraph above.

And finally, my favourite - we had to made a special rule about driving while distracted and made people wear cordless headsets for their cell phone and had to officially ban people from texting while driving-but everyone forgets we already had a rule; all along we've been told "driving without due care and attention" will get you demerits or even fines.

Oy! It must really suck to be in law enforcement some days.

Dangerous Dating

I was watching a commercial the other day for e-Harmony and it got me thinking - what if both people in a happily married/secure relationship both went on the site to see if they were a match for each other? And what if they weren't? What if they found out based on their profiles that they were a bad match?

Hmm, maybe that will be a movie plot? What do you think?

Butt Cleavage

I didn't realize it at the time, but when we were growing up, we were rather modest. The taunt "I see London, I see France, I see [insert name]'s underpants" was still heard occasionally. Us girls didn't even like our bra straps to be seen (and I'm not that old). And there were jokes aplenty about 'plumbers butt'.

But somewhere around the early 2000's when low rise jeans went really low (advertisements read "home of the 4" zipper" and the like) that it all went out the window. Chicks would squat down to look at something on the bottom shelf at the grocery and expose not just a bit of crack, but A LOT! It also became fashionable at this time for girls to show off the fancy little straps of their thong underwear.You'll never hear a guy complaining - but remember it's not always the young pretty little things, it's the big ol' hairy guys too that don't seem to mind letting the cool breeze tickle their backsides, or the skanky chick shuffling along with a ratty pair of sweat pants half on her ass - what is that about?

And so, not a day goes by when I see a minimum of 3 butt cracks a day! Just walking my dog at 6am will yield at least one as some guy gets in or out of his car. So, I'm curious - how many do you see each day? Do you notice? Do you even care?

The Wind Down

As our yoga studio prepares to shut it's doors in two weeks, each visit seems to present something new. Piece by piece the studio is coming apart. Last night there was no more internet or computer so no more scanner to sign in, and we had no candles for our night class - correction - we had ONE candle which was placed on the floor in the middle of the room.

As a customer, I didn't think it would affect me, but the studio isn't like other businesses. We become comfortable and familiar with the other people that attend the same classes and they seem to be going through different emotions as well.

I'm curious, have you ever been through something like this?